


Vicious Cycle

by Domik



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Epilepsy, F/M, Suicidal Thoughts, no happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-14
Updated: 2012-11-14
Packaged: 2017-11-18 16:12:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/562924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Domik/pseuds/Domik
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Messy Erica before she-wolf, kind of a lovesick teenage girl.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Vicious Cycle

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Wolf or any of the characters from it. What is a bit sad but true...  
> Also, English is not my first language, so be warned. Sorry for all the mistakes.
> 
> Enjoy if you wish.

Erica once again had an epilepsy attack, this time at Chemistry lesson. Students just started playing with some liquids and of course just at that moment she had to get the attack and douse herself.

As always she was in pair with nobody. Taking the most colorful of possible liquids, she didn’t think that it’ll end on her favorite T-shirt with Batman. Unfortunately it just happened and now she was standing in the bathroom swearing how stupid she was. Again.

She looked at herself in the mirror. Teary eyes, damaged complexion because of the medicines...

 She grimaced at this view. How could she imagined that somebody will look at her, talk with her. Someone. That Stiles will like her. More than like… But he surely is in love with Lydia.

_Perfect Lydia Martin with strawberry blonde curls, ideal, spotless. She is nothing in comparison with her…_

Erica exited the bathroom very slowly heading to the classroom. She’ll be back there and they’ll be looking at her oddly as if she was a weirdo. Some kind of joke...

And again. She had already one attack today. How many times will it happen today? _Let this day end finally_. She recalled herself that it was PE time. _Great, what happened this time…?_ _Oh yes, the climbing wall._

She slowly opened her eyes and she saw Scott – Stiles’ best friend.

"Are you ok?" he asked smiling at her with his puppy face.

"Yes, thanks. It’s just another attack. I’m sorry."

"You don’t have to apologize," replied Allison, his girlfriend, " Good, that Scott was nearby and he managed to catch you on time," she smiled.

" Jeez. I’m so sorry. I didn’t… Coach, can I leave?" Erica asked with hope in her eyes.

"Yes, yes. Sure go, just watch out for yourself."

Erica left smiling apologetically at Scott. Thinking about how lucky she was that he caught her before she smashed her head on the floor. _But maybe then it would be better, she thought for a moment._

In the bathroom she didn’t even look in the mirror. She washed her face with cold water and headed to the lockers. Walking through the corridor she slumped near the wall broken down by the past time. Quietly sniffling she found out that it would be better if Scott hadn’t caught her.

  _Yes, for sure it would be better. For her, for others._

Sometime later,  she heard movement in the corridor. She looked through the swollen eyelids and saw Stiles going in her direction.

"Erica, right? Are you okay?" Stiles asked worriedly.

She opened her eyes widely surprised trying to hide her face by putting her blonde curls on it. She was dreaming to become invisible in this moment.  


"Um. Yes, everything alright." she mumbled.

"Are you sure? It seems to me like something has happened. Oh, you probably don’t want to talk with me about it. I’m sorry."

"No!" she automatically answered Erica, "I mean… I only want…"

"Yes?" Stiles asked carefully.

"It doesn’t matter.  Leave me here, so I can sink in the ground."

Stiles muttered something under his breath what sounds like “And what now Stiles?” and he went to his class.

After classes Erica was going to the bus stop to go home, at last after this horrible day. Actually, Stiles said something to her. And even he knows her name, she noticed startled with this fact but what with it, when she looked like a mess…

Suddenly, the car horn knocked her out of brooding. She turned around. It was Stiles who was sitting in his Jeep. He rode up to her and asked, "Do you need a ride home?"

"Um… No, thanks. The bus should be in the moment."

"So you claim that you prefer half an hour in the bus? Come on, get in," Stiles smiled and opened her the passenger door.

Erica with no choice to made nervously got into the car.

"Thank you."

"No problem. With pleasure," Stiles answered happily.

Erica blushed and turned her head to the window looking at the trees. It took less than several peaceful silent when Stiles spoke, "I heard that you had an attack today. Scott told me that you fell into his arms," he chuckled.

"Let’s say that," Erica looked abashed, "I um, I didn’t want to. I apologized."

"What are you talking about? It’s not your fault!"

Erica didn’t hold on and she burst into tears. She curled as much as she could in the seat  and she was trying as much as possible to disappear. _What a shame. She burst into tears. In front of Stiles! Damn it!_

_"_ Erica?," he asked worried, "Did I say something wrong? I’m sorry."

But she didn’t answered, she was just whimpering quietly.

Stiles slowed down and he pulled over the sideway. Looking confused, Erica turned her eyes on Stiles. He couldn’t stand her sadness.

"Erica, what’s going on? Is this my fault? I wasn’t laughing at you," he said concerned.

"No, it’s not you," she whispered, "It’s me. It’s all me. My fault. Because of the stupid epilepsy everything sucks!," she started to complain, " I look like a total disaster. I’m losing control over myself. I blotched my favorite T-shirt at Chemistry. My eyes are red like bunny's. Well, and I again put on weight."

Erica fell silent when she realized what she had said. It spilled of her like the giant teapot with too much liquid.

She looked at Stiles ashamed when he was watching her with sadness.

"Damn it!" she whispered, "As if it was not enough, I’m feeling sorry for myself, when the guy I have crush on wants to drive me home without any reason."

_Shit! She told too much again_

 Stiles was looking at her disbelieving.

When Erica pushed the door-handle to get out of the car, he shouted, " Whoa! What are you doing?"

"I’m leaving. Not to mortify myself more," she muttered.

In the same moment Stiles grabbed her hand, "Do you realize that we are in half way to nowhere? We’re standing in the woods. How do you want to get to your home?" he asked surprised.

"I don’t know. I don’t care. Maybe wolves will find me and eat me, so I won’t be obliged to fight with all of this"

Stiles looked at her tenderly and he gripped softly her chin. He directed her sight at him and asked, "Seriously?"

" What,"  she was raging, "Yes, I want grizzlies to eat me."

"I wasn’t asking about that. Did I just hear that you’re sitting in the car with Mr. Right?" he asked smiling widely.

Erica blushed and she hid under cover of her hair. Stiles grabbed them and brushed them away. She was looking at him and without knowing it she sight. He was only waiting for this. Smiling even widely, he inclined on her and kissed Erica on the cheek.

"What are you doing?" she asked startled, "Don’t take pity on me. It’s not worthy."

"Shut up!" huffed Stiles, "I take no pity on anyone. You’re beautiful, don't think otherwise."

Erica didn’t understand. _Did she appear in some book or movie? It must be a dream. It’s impossible._ _Stiles was just kissing her and he told her that she is beautiful?! But he’s in love with Lydia…_

_"_ Erica," he whispered kissing her forehead, both cheeks, nose and finally lips, "You’re pretty and don’t believe if someone tell you you’re not. Well, and you have a T-shirt with Batman," he grinned.

Erica smiled uncertainly, "Stiles," she whispered bend over him to kiss him and… she heard her mom voice, "Erica! You had an attack again! Have you stopped taking your meds again?!"

Erica snapped out and she saw that she is lying on the floor in the kitchen in her house. She looked at her T-shirt with Batman but it was clean as new.

That means all that – Chemistry, Scott and climbing wall, Stiles…  didn’t happen?! She closed her eyes remembering what Stiles was saying, his kisses and his scent.

She opened eyes and she started crying.  _She knew! She knew that something so perfect couldn’t be true. Nobody will love her. Moreover, not Stiles._

Not telling anyone, she left home and headed to the woods. "I hope that some wolves will eat me.” She thought floundering into darkness of the forest.


End file.
